This is a response to a response. I was on youtube the other day and I was reading the comments under a Sigur Ros video and the usual emotional responses or the descriptions of the emotional experiences that people had when first listening to the group were definitely the norm. I did stumble upon one however that was at first understandable and then as I thought about it disheartening. The person said something to the affect: "I love Jonsi (the lead singer of the group) but I wish he wasn't gay. It's not that I have anything against gay people, I just wish he wasn't." I think this quote is significant for a myriad of reasons. It suggests first of all, that there is something undesirable about being gay, second, that one should be apologetic for saying the first sentence, and lastly, that sexual tendency affects a fan's relationship with an artist. I'm sure as hell not going into the first argument to the extent of whether or not that statement is true. It's a discussion better left alone- for now. This first part does raise an interesting point though and I'm going to relate it to something that I know. I'm black. I wonder how many times someone has met me, or introduced me to someone else, or hung out with me and wanted to drop the "n" word or pretend like he/she was an expert on hip hop and really wished that I was just another white person. I know there had to have been times in my lifetime when that was true and I was unaware of it. Now this case may be slightly unique because America is such a politically correct place and people may just not want to slip up or seem offensive. It seems like nowadays that being deemed a racist is up there with being a child molester and so people may just not want to be careless and make a mistake. A.k.a. when the black guy is gone, we can now relax and say whatever we want without fear of something bad happening. I definitely want to say that I do not think that this is not the normal case, but I'm sure this has happened before, and that's the only point I'm trying to make. (Now I've become the apologetic one) There is also something at play here though, and it is a comfort with those who are like you. This can also be a black/white thing and I'm sure those who do not know me probably assume that we have much less in common than we actually do. This is slightly beside the point though, because I think it is natural for people to be comfortable with those types of people who are from the same place, like the same things, act similar ways, and look a certain way. I think this "look a certain way" transcends color more than you'd think, but once again, I digress. So back to the original statement, I think there is something there when someone says that they wish one of their favorite artists wasn't gay. Now I may be being a tad presumptuous when I say this, but I am pretty sure that the person saying this was not gay him/herself. And if this is the case then it does not matter whether this person is a girl or guy. This is because girls probably want to admire a guy they think is in touch with his feelings and is a creative genius. They might want hope that some straight guy actually possesses these qualities and this could be a very innocent reason to wish Jonsi was staight. If a dude said it, he probably said it wishing that he could identify with Jonsi better as a straight dude as opposed to a gay one. These reasons seem relatively harmless, but think about those people that are on the outside, those who are in those "less desirable" groups. It hurts to know that you are not as well liked or looked up to being in a certain group, no matter what it is. What makes this so weird is that this is so far from an expression of disdain or hate, it is very much a flattering statement with a tiny bit of opinion. For the most part, people are moving away from prejudiced speech and this is where we get the second part of the implication of the quote. Some people feel a natural urge to apologize for statements like these because they feel that they are being judgmental or erecting walls up that may be offensive. People need to stop apologizing and they need to start empathizing. The worry about being sexist, racist or offensive goes away if you can properly put yourself in the shoes of those you are talking about and assessing whether or not they would be hurt. In fact, this is not just not being prejudiced, it's becoming a more loving person because you are connecting with others. There we have it. One step to transforming from a racist to Ghandi, now if only we could take those holes out of the sheets...This is all relevant and good but I once again am going off on a tangent. To tie back into the third part, it definitely does affect the relationship of fan to artist when there is something undesirable about the artist to the fan: there were a lot more A-Rod fans a few months ago. This is definitely a lesser point, and probably something I'll get into later, but there is one thing worth noting. The paraphrased quote that I have definitely over-analyzed assumes that Jonsi would still be the great artist he is today if we removed a large part of him. I guess that's something to think about. God is love, Rev Run.

Song of the day:

Sleepyhead by Passion Pit

What's the song of the day? easy. Family business by Kanye West is by far the song of the day. for some reason i became kinda homesick, but not for things or places, my nostalgia mostly was derivative of old relationships. i don't really mind not seeing the people i grew up with on a daily basis, it's just knowing that if i wanted to see them, it would be very difficult, if not impossible to do so. it's a strong feeling of distance that happens i guess when you dedicate at least 9 months of your year in madison wisconsin. i miss being able to call up certain people and just being able to stop by and say hello or even have the chance of running into the somewhere. there is zero chance out here.

these non-capitalized sentiments lead me to my point that i want to make. for a while i thought that one of my biggest struggles was living in the past. i thought that whenever i wished something was the way it used to be that i was somehow acting within a safety blanket or in a wimpy manner. while i believe that to be true if someone is constantly nostalgic and woeful about their present condition, i'm not exactly sure if it is at all wrong to even have a constant remembering of where you came from. so here's my point...i think most of our lives are lived in the past anyway, so why should we fight the feeling of remembering it so much. almost everything we do in life is based off of past knowledge that we've acquired over the years. this is to say that whenever someone is weighing the outcomes of certain actions, they are really just digging into their past to decide whether or not they should actually do the action. this is of course assuming that all memory that has been made was in the past and that therefore by digging into it, one is living in the past in some sense of the word. if this model were true, then the only thing current in life would be the sensory experience. wow. i'm tired and i need to chill. much more on this later. i think my psych class has me on to something. hollaback.